Genetics Can Really Suck Sometimes

I'm bringing this over from Facebook for the few that read here, but don't have me over there. I won't be back to update this much later, so updates will need to be grabbed from our mutual friend....

This is going to be a bit long. I'm sorry for that. However, I'm anticipating the "OMG How'd THAT happen??" coming from the people that weren't in the loop yet and I want to be sure they have some background on it and see what we've been fighting.

A couple years ago, hubby came down sick.... really sick. He was sent in for some testing and then referred to a cardiologist. Turns out that he has a weakened heart. It could be genetic or it could be that he'd gotten a virus. We suspect that it's the former as the condition exists on both sides of his family. Gotta love genetics.  Anyhow, they put him on some meds to see if they could get the heart regulated somewhat. We were told it wouldn't get back to 100%, but with meds, diet, and proper care that it was possible that he'd get back to about 40-45% efficiency.

Over the last 2 years, he's been to the cardiologist every 6 months for a check up. They'd mentioned that sometimes people with this condition need to have a defibrillator implanted, but they weren't sure he'd need it. At the appointment 12 months ago, the doctor asked if he was taking his meds. At the time hubby was working one of those rotating shifts and as such was working nights. It's so hard for him to remember to take his medicines when his day is screwed up like that. However, about then work had decided to put everyone on permanent shifts (no more switching ... YAY!!!) and hubby put in for the morning shift... mostly because he prefers the days , as well as my insistence that I wanted him on a shift where it's easier to get help if he needs it. Yeah, the supreme night owl INSISTED he go and stay on days. So the dr wrote a note for him stating he HAS to be on a day shift. Period. This way if hubby didn't get the shift he wanted, we'd be certain he'd at least be on days. We decided at that appointment that we'd give it 6 more months on the meds now that there was a better chance he'd get them taken regularly.

At the appointment 6 months ago,  they'd seen some improvement, but not much. It was enough to give us hope. Fast forward to the appointment earlier this month...  it seems that his heart has plateaued and there isn't going to be any more improvement. So the discussion went from "Let's give it 6 more months and see what happens" to "I'm sorry, sir, but you are going to need to have an ICD (Implantable Cardioverter Defibrillator) put in."  He's only 47.


We discussed the 2 different types. The newer models don't do as much as the older versions did, but they have the benefit of being less invasive (at least in my opinion). Why? Because the older versions require that a wire (a lead) is placed in the heart, where the newer models don't require that.  Hubby decided he wanted the newer model (even though that sucker rather large, at least 2-3 times the size of the older ones). So the dr set him up to get screened last week to see if he was going to be compatible. He's not.


Seems that when he gets turned and twisted in certain positions, the machine doesn't get the signals as it should. So he needs the more invasive one.

Anyhow, he has this 3hr + monster surgery tomorrow (Monday morning). Those that have known me for awhile know that I'm a nervous wreck right now. Stress is one of my migraine triggers. Any guess how many migraines I've had in the last week? Yep, you're right. Every bloody day. I half expect I'll have one later when I wake up, another all day on Monday, and more than likely another on Tuesday.

I'll try to be back in on Monday night to give an update. He'll be in the hospital overnight and with any luck, he'll be released on Tuesday morning or afternoon. We'll be staying in a hotel out near the hospital from Sunday to possibly Weds morning.  Should be home that evening. We have a family member coming in later today (Sunday) to help out, so we're set there. What we do need, however, is prayers, candle lightings, whatever you do.... it would be appreciated.

For those that know what he does for a living.... this means a good many of the machines he works on and fixes at work? Well he can no longer approach them. And those machines he CAN work on? Well if they're too close to one of the others, he won't be able to touch those either because it could mess with his implant. Basically, most of what he was HIRED to do... he can no longer do. Thank goodness the bosses at work seem to like him. The one has suggested getting him a minion to do that work. 


Over Rainbow Bridge

Goodbye, sweetheart. As sad as I am that you said goodbye.... I'm so glad you're no longer in pain and can breathe easier. I'm so very happy that you get to see your big brother again. So many years have passed, I'm sure he's missed you dearly. Be sure to hold a spot for your sister, you know the ridiculous looking puppy that talked funny. It hasn't dawned on her yet, but I"m sure she'll be missing you in a few days.

 If it should be that I grow weak 
And pain should keep me from my sleep, 
Then you must do what must be done, 
For this last battle cannot be won. 
You will be sad, I understand. 
Don't let your grief then stay your hand. 
For this day, more than all the rest, 
Your love for me must stand the test. 
We've had so many happy years. 
What is to come can hold no fears. 
You'd not want me to suffer so; 
The time has come -- please let me go. 
Take me where my need they'll tend, 
And please stay with me till the end. 
Hold me firm and speak to me, 
Until my eyes no longer see. 
I know in time that you will see 
The kindness that you did for me. 
Although my tail its last has waved, 
From pain and suffering I've been saved. 
Please do not grieve -- it must be you 
Who had this painful thing to do. 
We've been so close, we two, these years; 
Don't let your heart hold back its tears. 

--- Anonymous ---



So, it's been one of those days and it's not even half over yet. I read far too long last night and into this morning so I had trouble getting going at my usual hour. Who are we kidding, I didn't even come close to seeing my usual waking up time. Thanks to the weather pattern that's been in the area, I haven't been feeling even close to the 85% I usually run at. Don't get me wrong, I love the cold and wet, I just hate how it's been making me feel as I get older. Weather like this usually means migraines most of the day now so I try to be sure to wake up slowly. Don't rush into getting ready because the wrong move could trigger more pain than I care to have. So anyhow, as I was waking up and getting my meds into me, I heard the front door open up. Hubby came home, early. I know he hasn't been feeling too well either so I just figured he came home sick. No biggie. Then he yells up the stairs that he's taking Katy to the vet. Considering our discussion from last night, this wasn't much of a surprise. Even on her meds, she's had a rough couple days and her poor fuzzy belly's been so distended. It looked as though one more trip to the water bowl was going to make her pop. So he called this morning and made an appointment to see what can be done. He took her in and I guess the look on the vet's face said it all. He said he could drain some of the fluid off, but it was likely that she might not survive the procedure. All it entails is a syringe to siphon off the excess liquid. However, she's an old dog, not in great health with a heart problem... so the stress could kill her. Hubby decided to have it done anyhow because she was so uncomfortable and having trouble getting around. Good news is she made it. He got a load of bad news while he was in for the appointment. Katy's in her next decline and we're not entirely certain she'll make it to her next birthday, actually we're not certain she'll make Christmas at this point. Especially since there's still some drippage still and that's got me more than a bit worried. I've contacted hubby,who in turn called the vet. I'm just waiting on a call from the vet to see what's best to do at this point.

The question is now becoming quality of life because that belly's just going to refill. We'll need to bring her in and expose her to that stressful situation again and again. Each time is a possibility that she could die right there on the table. I've told him.... it might be time. As much as I hate to say it, as much as it's hard to tell our girl is really sick by the way she acts, it might be time. We're hoping she gets through Christmas at least so we don't have to face the heartbreak during the holidays, but when a body's ready to go... it's ready to go.



So the Creative Moose has wandered off into the dandelion patch and has been refusing to come out forever now. Trying as I might to entice him to frolic a bit, but it's been damn well impossible. Stupid mooses. I see a dear friend from NYC area has started up her blog again. I so missed seeing stuff from her. After a back and forth in the email from her I figured I'd better drop a note in here and let others that don't see me much in FB know that I'm still kicking.... somewhat. Seriously need to get over this writer's block. Anyhow, shortly after dropping my friend a note, I saw this on my newsfeed:
You have permission to rest.  
You are not responsible for fixing everything that is broken. 
You do not have to try and make everyone happy. 
For now, take time for you. 
It's time to replenish.

Okay, so it's taking me alot longer to replenish than most. Considering the 10+ years of crap I dealt with and all the medical shit that's been hitting the fan over here, it really isn't surprising that the moose is refusing to leave the dandelion patch.  Maybe I need to think and refresh some of these pages because evidently,  some are no longer what I need to be doing. It's highly possible I simply need to close out a few and retool a few others.


Tomorrow's Never Promised

So Sunday I signed into Facebook as usual and found a friend request sitting in there from a person that I haven't heard from in several years. By several years, I mean that I was 10 or 12 the last time I saw her putting it at more than 30 years since we'd talked. I have my account on lock-down, so it's very hard to find me if there isn't at least one friend in common. I noticed there was one.... a girl I had gone to school with. So I went to the mutual friend's page, to see if the requester and I had been talking or if she'd "liked" a thread I'd been talking on. Something to tell me why I was getting this request now....

And that's when I saw it..... those 3 letters that no one ever wants to see on a friend's page.... R I P. Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? She and I had just been talking on Friday evening, early Saturday morning about a tv program. Suddenly, just like that, she's gone.... and all because of a freak accident. The same kind of accident that I had not 2-3 years ago. Only this girl, she wasn't so lucky. Seems she fell and hit her head. That's all it took. A fall and then nothing. From what I saw in the comments, they found clots in her chest. It wasn't specified whether they were in her heart or lungs, just that they were there.


She was so excited about what was going on in her life. She had a good job and had just moved several months ago to her dream home.  There had frequently been new pictures on her page showing what she'd done to decorate and how well her garden was coming along. I hear that she'd had a Memorial Day picnic at her new home and had one planned for The Fourth of July. Things were really looking up for her and her long time boyfriend. Then in an instant, it was gone and we're left with a hole in our lives.  She was only a few months older than me..... she was only 46......

It got me to thinking exactly how much there was to lose and exactly how lucky I am. Make sure you tell those close to you that you love them today and hold them a bit closer because tomorrow's never ever promised.....


Just a few things

Still trying to get back into some of the habits I had before. More than likely going to take a bit to re-establish those patterns again....

Hubby's had this week off as he gets back into night-shift mode for work. We've had some news though. It's likely that it'll only be a one month deal this time around because the company is looking to restructure and make a permanent scheduling. This means that if you have a compressed day schedule, you'll be on days... period. If you're on nights, you'll stay nights. I told hubby that he might want to put in for a day-shift, even though the sleep schedule will kill me. Why? Because of the health of 75% of the life-forms in the household. We need to be available to get to dr/specialist/vet appointments and a night-shift schedule simply doesn't make that easy in the slightest.

***and that news hasn't hit my FB page yet ^_~ ***

We had to get rid of Penny (our Lincoln) a couple weeks ago or so. She'd turned into a real Money Pit to say the least. The repair a couple months ago was actually more than the car was worth so when she had another issue come up, we decided it was time to get something a bit newer. We are now driving a 2012 Nissan Altima that we named Anyssa. Yeah, it sounds like an odd name, but hubby wanted something that combined Nissan and Altima. *shrugs* Actually, a funny story comes to mind. We'd named the car and I posted a picture of our new precious when a friend asked what color she was (she couldn't tell if the car was dark blue or black).  When I said she was dark blue, my friend pointed out that she needs to have a Tardis sticker on her. With this idea bouncing around in my head, I thought "why not name her after a companion?" So I looked up all the Dr Who companions and imagine my surprise to find that she was named somewhat appropriately! Heh.

Hubby's looking at wanting to move. I know, we've been saying this forever now. Anyhow, we're in the process of starting to weed out stuff. I got started on the clothing the other day and we ended up dropping off a huge bag of clothes to the Goodwill store down the road. While we were at it, we took in 3 boxes worth of dishes (we'd decided to switch to some lightweight Corelle dishes because the stuff we were using was getting too heavy for me to handle anymore thanks to my arthritis). I still have the dresser and the tub of out of seasons to go through yet. I half expect there will be another bag or two of them to donate. Tomorrow's project is to start going through my crafting items and figure out what I really plan on doing and what I can ditch.  A few of the small pieces will stay (like my Santa trio) and I forsee a bunch getting re-homed or tossed. After I get the boxes downstairs and the craft closet upstairs weeded, I'll be going through my ceramic dolls. Hubby said I should keep them but I pointed out to him that I'm simply not as into them as I was and I could stand to get rid of about 1/3 of them. After the dolls, the stuffed animal collection will get culled. Tired of seeing some of this stuff around. So much to do....

I know there's a bunch more that needs updating. If one of my FB friends would kindly post in the comments the items I need to discuss in here... because I've slept a few times since it all happened.  Thanks bunches!


Just a quick jaunt back home

Just a little visit down home with his folks. We'll be starting home tomorrow. If hubby's smart, he'll stop half way so we can rest. Long story... let's just say I never thought I would find someone I despised near as much as my ex..... and I found one in hubby's black sheep uncle...

Anyhoo.... I just wanted to pop in and share a picture of hubby's sweet granny. She's 97 years old this year. I think she looks great!



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