I think part of my problem lately is something I saw on a tv talk show either Weds or Thurs. I think it was Thurs now that I think of it. I dont normally watch those things because alot of times they'll cover a topic that depresses the hell out of me and I've had more than enough depression for my lifetime as it is. This one particular one I stumbled over was on a segment dealing with sociopaths. When I say stumbled over I mean I wasnt really watching tv, but merely moving from the office near the livingroom through to the bedroom....it'd make things easier if there was a door straight from the office to the bedroom Im telling ya. Anyhow, they had a therapist talking about what a sociopath is and why they are the way they are.
so·ci·o·path (sō'sē-ə-păth, -shē-) noun
One who is affected with a personality disorder marked by antisocial behavior.
Definition courtesy of The American Heritage® Dictionary. Considering the topic I have going in my Padded Room, I found this a familiar yet depressing topic and was wondering what she'd have to say that would explain WHY I had to go through what I did. The definition definitely matches the situation and the person. So of course I have to dig and see how much more matches. While looking up the traits I found a good article
here. For ease I'll put the two most telling paragraphs in here as it's a rather long read otherwise:
Sociopaths have always existed in varying form and to various degrees. They have been known by various titles. They have been studied using various techniques, and through the years their ailment has been blamed on various causes. But one thing never varies: all sociopaths share three common characteristics. They are all very egocentric individuals with no empathy for others, and they are incapable of feeling remorse or guilt.
Sociopaths are very egocentric individuals that lack a sense of personal responsibility and morality. They may be impulsive, manipulative, reckless, quarrelsome, and consistent liars. Sociopaths are usually unable to sustain relationships and have a total lack of remorse for their actions. The sociopath may also be very prone to aggressive, hostile, and sometimes violent behaviour. This aggression may or may not lead to criminal behaviour and often takes the form of domestic violence. Along with these other actions, sociopaths often engage in self-destructive behaviour such as alcoholism or addiction to drugs. This, of course, usually worsens many aspects of the sociopathic behaviour. Despite these previous symptoms, the sociopath may be an excellent actor, always appearing charming, calm, and collected. They usually have a normal or above normal intelligence level and good verbal fluency. It is these qualities that sometimes place the sociopath in leadership positions within their social groups and often make it hard to spot their "black side".
The person in my Padded Room section exhibits signs of the true sociopath as well as the Dyssocial sociopath described later in the article. He hasnt shown signs of the secondary or neurotic sociopath yet, but that's because he's still behind bars from that last time. It's just a matter of time to see if he's going to be a repeat offender. If he ends up behind bars shortly after being released, we'll have our answer to this.
Another article that goes into a list of traits of the sociopath. Most telling is about halfway down in the section labelled Psychopaths Next Door. Here's a link that takes you to the site they got that part of the article from.
Anyhow... back to the tv program. The guest speaker went on to say that she believes there is no cure for this problem and that many people are born with these tendencies. If you go by the listing of traits you can find online, many could easily be called sociopaths. Her biggest point was that although born with the tendency, not everyone goes all Dr Jeckle and Mr Hyde. She said her theory was that the environment that the sociopath is born into has alot to do with it. So, a boy child born with sociopathic tendencies gets born into a family where there's a strong father figure that yells alot and talks down to the females in the family...this will more than likely foster a young man who believes it's appropriate to belittle and verbally abuse women as this is all he's seen for his whole life. Once one sociopathic trait is fostered, it stands to reason that other traits will come to the surface right? So what if this ISNT all my ex's fault? What if just possibly it's a genetic problem that cant be cured? Im not sure whether I hate him or pity him at this point. I am grateful that I wont be bearing any kids like him for sure. It also makes me awfully glad Im where Im at now.
I know that was a deep topic but it's kinda been on my mind for a few days.....